A word about grieving

Grieving is a tricky thing.  Everyone has to grieve at some point in their lives, and we each grieve in our own way.  There is no one right way to grieve, and there is no circumstance, in my opinion, where grieving is not an option.   

Grieving I realize, is a very strong word, but I am using it loosely here.   Maybe you are grieving the loss of someone, maybe you are lamenting that your job is terrible, maybe you are angry that you were slighted.   I think that all those things fall under some sort of grieving.   The only other word I could use is complaining, but I don’t like that word.  Complaining is always viewed as negative and a waste of time, whereas grieving can be cathartic and even healthy.

So, why am I touching on this subject today?  I am not particularly having a bad day, I don’t have complaints about my life.  I have a beautiful, wonderful life.  (are you sensing the but here?)   BUT, I did go to a funeral last night, that was one of the saddest and most tragic funerals I have ever been to, and I had a Relay for Life meeting.  We also have had to make several hard decision in our lives lately, and for some reason I was feeling guilty about grieving.   All of those things started me thinking, and for me thinking leads to blogging.

To further explain this rant, I have to give you an example.  If a man breaks up with a woman because she is not the one, I still give him full rights to grieve.  He can be sad, and miss that woman even if breaking up with her was the right thing to do.  If a woman makes a decision to not have any babies, or another baby she still has full rights to grieve.  She can be sad that she won’t experience those things even if she knows it is the right decision for her.  If you hate your job and you need to grieve the fact that you do.  Fine, do it. 

I am not the person to condemn the griever.  In fact, I really dislike it when people do just that.  I realize that there is always someone out there that has it worse than you, and there is always someone out there that has it better than you.  I think that goes for every single person on the planet.    That does not take away your right to grieve things in your own life. 

So, why the blog?  I am giving myself, you, and everyone else out there the right to grieve.  No one gave me that power.  I just sort of took it.   But if my subconscious that is filled with some pretty awesome irish-catholic guilt has the power to take away my right to grieve I most certainly have the right to give it back.